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Just Married: Josh & Jodie Ruyle

Just Married: Josh & Jodie Ruyle

Before I can talk to you about Jodie and Josh’s relations, I want to tell you a little bit about each of them as individuals.

If you knew Jodie and me when we were younger, you can probably remember how much we fought and hated each other. Well . . . it was probably just me doing all the hating; Jodie was just being a typical younger sister who looked up to her older sibling. But I couldn’t stand how much she copied and bothered me, especially when I was trying to act cool in front of my friends.

No doubt you’ve heard my story about the California Rollin’ girl, a doll I wanted so badly for Christmas. When I discovered it hidden in the crawlspace, I was elated, just to have my dreams crushed when “Santa” gave it to Jodie. She didn’t even want it!

And I’m sure Jodie has told each one of you how my idea of playing Barbies was having her set them all up, just to decide I didn’t want to play anymore. I think you get the point: Jodie and I didn’t have the greatest relationship when we were kids.

Fast-forward a few years, after each of us had grown up just a little, and our relationship took a turn. Instead of us fighting with one another, feisty Jodie was fighting off anyone who did me wrong. When a guy grabbed me at a bar, Jodie was right there to slap him across the face – and not once, but twice. On another occasion, she reamed one of my supposed friends for ruining my birthday.

Fast-forward a little more to the Jodie and Lindsay today: And the only issue between us is 1,036 miles. It’s hard for me to believe that I ever wanted to rip her head off. She truly is my best friend and I can’t imagine what life would be like without her.

I think that might just be the way Josh and Jodie feel about each other today – not the part about wanting to rip each other’s heads off, but the part about being best friends that couldn’t get by without one another. Josh confirmed these thoughts when I recently picked his brain about how well he knew his fiancée. In May 2007 when Jodie told Josh he “needed to commit or lose her,” he says, in his own words, “I couldn’t stand the thought of losing her, so I decided to commit. Best decision of my life.”

In the early days, I might have been a bit hesitant about Josh, being the protective older sister. But once Josh became a more permanent fixture in Jodie’s life, I was finally able to get to know him. Although Nick will do a better job of telling you all about Josh, I am sure on a few things . . .

He gives the best hugs. As long as I’ve known him, he’s always given genuine hugs that make you feel like you’ve known him all your life. Most of you have probably experienced them, but if you haven’t, I highly recommend hugging Josh at some point tonight.

He’s also one of the smartest people I know. Jodie says I shouldn’t say that around him because it might go to his head, but it’s true. Josh is a bundle of knowledge who always has a different or unique perspective on everything. I always leave a conversation with him feeling smarter.

Lastly – and most importantly – he is an extraordinary man who is perfect for my sister. He balances her out and makes her happy. He’s kind, thoughtful, welcoming and most of all patient. And he assured me that he knows full well what he’s getting himself into by marrying into the Holloway family.

Josh, Jodie, just keep doing what you’re doing. Because as individuals, you both are amazing. And together you shine even stronger. Saying each of you is marrying your best friend sounds cliché, but it’s true. You truly are perfect for one another. I wish you both the very best in your life as a married couple. And I love you both to the moon and back.

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Personal Life

Los Angeles: Pros

  • friends are here
  • Chris just moved back
  • great roommate situation
  • cheaper flights to Colorado
  • part of a fun kickball team
  • I’m partial to SoCal fashion/style
  • I love my life up here, maybe I’m not ready to give it up


Los Angeles: Cons

  • been in SoCal a long time
  • hard to meet quality guys in LA
  • I don’t have many single friends here anymore


New York City: pros

  • new city to explore
  • new city for friends and family to visit
  • closer to Ottawa, where Melissa may live one day 😉
  • meet new people, make new friends
  • a change from SoCal’s life-long bachelors
  • ready for a change
  • lots of city kickball leagues


New York City: cons

  • no friends there, leaving friends
  • leaving Chris, who just moved back
  • no family there, and family would be further away
  • flights to Colorado are more expensive
  • it’s hard to feel attractive in winter clothes
  • I’m terrified to uproot my great life in LA

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While this post is exactly what it seems – a comparison of the country’s two most-popular cities, a battle between West Coast and East Coast – on a deeper level, it’s a personal struggle I’m trying to work through as I decide which city I should live in. I’ve been offered two opportunities at the company I currently work for: 1) continue as editorial manager in the same business, but with a new team and in a new city, or 2) continue as editorial manager of the same team and in the same office, but for a new business that could grow exponentially.

Both options sound very appealing to me, and both are equally great opportunities for me. Similarly, I would be an asset to my employer in either position. So I stand at a crossroads, one foot pointed in each direction, with a very difficult decision to make. This potential multipart post is an attempt to sway myself one way or another.


Lifestyle

Los Angeles: Pros

  • great weather
  • beach
  • access to outdoors/nature
  • bigger apartments
  • walk to work
  • walk to many amenities
  • laid back
  • access to snowboarding
  • less expensive than NYC
  • great food
  • great music scene


Los Angeles: Cons

  • poor public transportation
  • horrible traffic
  • takes forever to get anywhere
  • very spread out
  • still an expensive city
  • potential for earthquakes


New York City: Pros

  • good public transportation (and I love public transportation)
  • I always wanted to try living in a big city (it’s on my bucket list!)
  • walk to many amenities
  • could sell my car
  • save $75/mo on car insurance
  • save on gas money
  • new city to explore
  • great, accessible food
  • great music scene


New York City: Cons

  • limited access to outdoors/nature
  • going snowboarding would be difficult
  • limited 24 Hour Fitness gyms
  • very expensive
  • small apartments
  • probably wouldn’t be able to walk to work
  • couldn’t have a car (limited parking, wouldn’t want to drive there)
  • no Target, Home Depot, Best Buy, etc.
  • grocery shopping is more difficult
  • limited grocery choices, limited produce
  • potential for hurricanes

Being the creative and cheeseball that I am, I decided to turn my company’s holiday party announcement into a rap. I’m on the social committee and we planned a festive time aboard the Tiki Mermaid for a cruise in Marina del Rey. With that in mind, only one rap could do . . .

Get your towels ready,
It’s about to go down.
Our office building doesn’t have a deck.
So we’re going somewhere that does.
We’re doing this, let’s go.

We’re on a boat, we’re on a boat
Everybody look at us
‘Cause we’re sailing on a boat
We’re on a boat, we’re on a boat
Take a good hard look
At IBISWorld’s boat.

We’re getting a boat for our holiday jam.
Straight flowing on a boat like pirates on the lam.
Busting five knots, wind whipping through our coats.
Well, maybe not that fast, but we will be on a boat.

Take a picture dudes, we’re on a Cali cruise.
Sipping fine wine and drinks ‘cause we like booze
In our luau shirts and holiday tresses,
We’re eating finger foods, instead of
updating global messes.

We’re riding Tiki Mermaid style, jealous I bet
Far from crashing waves, no one’s getting wet.
Marina del Rey days become del Rey nights,
But we’ll navigate the dark with our safety lights.

We’ll catch a bus and, then board our boat and,
Spend three hours booze cruising till we can’t stand.
We’re the best IBIS team in the whole wide world
Most know how to party, but some may hurl.

Sub-mit report, this boat is real.

No office! We at sea, land lover!
No coffee! Get a drink, land lover!
We on the deck with our toys, land lover!
This boat engine make noise, land lover!

Hey Harv, look out for us now,
Getting’ quite tipsy on the starboard bow.
Might step off of this boat into the sea somehow,
Like Rob Andrews, anything is possible!

Never thought we’d be on a boat
It’s a big blue watery road,
Justin Ruthven, look at us, oh, all hands on deck.
We totally earned the day
To have a party boat come our way
Believe us when we say: It’s Tiki Mermaid.

We’re on a boat, we’re on a boat
Everybody look at us
‘Cause we’re sailing on a boat
We’re on a boat, we’re on a boat
Take a good hard look
At IBISWorld’s boat.

Josh McBee contributed to this rap.

I joined Plenty of Fish… wait, let me rephrase that… My girlfriend signed me up for Plenty of Fish against my will several months ago. I had always been skeptical of online dating sites: partly because of all the horror stories I’d heard, partly because I’m not confident in humankind enough to believe there aren’t creeps out there and mostly because digital dating just doesn’t seem natural to me.

Despite my reluctance, I picked a few photos for my profile and wrote up a quick “About Me” section. It felt so weird talking about myself, basically advertising myself to my target audience. And like in the real advertising world, I knew many people outside of my target audience would see my “marketing message” and think it was meant for them (more
on some of the crazy messages I’ve received later).

The day I signed up, my roommate and I spent the evening “shopping” on the website. It was almost like any other online shopping we do, for shoes, clothes, etc. A picture would catch my eye, and so I’d click into the profile to read about the guy. I’ll admit it’s fun, but it’s definitely a weird feeling.

Within a couple days, other fishers (guys) started writing me. I felt overwhelmed and flustered with all the messages from complete strangers. And I especially felt torn as to what to do with the messages from guys I wasn’t interested in for one reason or another. Do I respond? And if so, what do I say? “Thanks for writing, but you’re too short.” Or, “Thanks for all the compliments, but I’m looking for a guy with a job.” Is that better or worse than hearing nothing at all? Based on the greater number of misses than hits I received, I ultimately decided not to respond to the guys I wasn’t interested in. I truly felt bad, but later on my decision was confirmed as the right thing to do because I finally worked up the courage to actually start “approaching” guys myself, and let’s just say I’ve had my fair share of ignored messages. Kinda hurts the ego, not gonna lie.

Since signing up, especially in the beginning, I’ve received messages from guys spanning all walks of life. And the messages they choose to send me are equally diverse. Some have written me poems, ones that I can only assume are copied and pasted into messages for every girl they write. Some have written novels that even a longwinded writer like myself struggles to get through. On the other end of the spectrum are effortless one-liners, or even a lone “hi” or smiley face, as if that’s supposed to spark conversation. Some guys will at least start off with a question, but they neglect to actually look over my profile to see their question has already been answered. Just as I suspected in my initial hesitation for joining, there are a fair share of creeps and pervs out there: I’ve been propositioned for a threesome, I’ve been offered money for sexual favors and I’ve been given details on what guys would like to do to me. Needless to say, I didn’t feel bad not responding to any of them.

Of the guys I did respond to, two have lead to dates. Although I won’t go into too much detail on the guys, the dates went great. The first one involved biking around Santa Monica, stopping for drinks, dinner and dessert. I just didn’t feel any chemistry between us, and I can only assume he felt the same way because we never really started talking again after. The second date was drinks and apps at a cool gastropub, also in Santa Monica. Again, I think it went well: we got along, good conversation. But by the end of the date, I knew there wouldn’t be a second date; just some cultural barriers that I think would make it too difficult. Unfortunately, I think the guy left the date hoping for another, because he texted me incessantly for weeks after.

Once again I was in an awkward position of not knowing how to respond. How do I tell him I’m not interested? I never came to the answer, so I just briefly responded to his texts every once in awhile, hoping he’d get the hint. Unlucky for me he did not and ended up texting me in a drunken rage (assumed) one Friday night that I “suck” and have a “fake attitude,” oh and that I owe him $20. I took the out and told him not to text me again. He said he “for sure wouldn’t,” but only after texting that he thinks I’m “ridiculous” and I wasted $50 and two hours of his time. Just two weeks ago he requested me as a Facebook friend – as if! I promptly declined and blocked him from ever contacting me again.

Even guy friends who admit I needed to be honest with him can’t believe the audacity. I’ll just take the experience as a lesson learned: insist that I pay for my half (he wouldn’t let me) and don’t worry about saving a guy’s ego.

Just recently I learned that my good friend signed up on Plenty of Fish. We spent a good hour detailing our experiences, swapping stories and recommending “fish” to one another – whether for a good match or a good laugh, like the guy who details his shaving preferences. She has more experience on dating sites than I without significant success (i.e. many of the horror stories I’ve heard in the past have been hers), but her positive attitude and popularity on the site have encouraged me to spend some more time fishing. Sure, I put my bait out there, but I’ll never catch anything if I’m not paying attention to my line. Wish me luck!

Note: This other fisherwoman, my roommate (who just joined OKCupid) and I have decided to document our experiences in the hopes of writing a book, so stay tuned!

I guess this is how memes become the viral messages that they are . . .

Just wanted to share this hilarious website that pokes a little fun at Ryan Gosling’s sensitive side. I especially like the clips that compare him to Joseph Gordon-Levitt, my other heart throb. For the record, I’ve been in love with Ryan Gosling way before all this recent hype. He swept me away when I saw his band in concert more than a year ago. Thump thump, thump thump.

*I hesitated when deciding where to categorize this blog: can Ryan Gosling qualify as one of my Goals?

The other day I posted a status update on Facebook – something I’m known for doing quite frequently – not really expecting a response or caring if anyone commented on it. The status was regarding an encounter I’d just had with a homeless person outside my favorite 7-11 in Santa Monica. The incident wasn’t uncomfortable or frightening like you might reasonably assume. The homeless mas was actually quite friendly; our meeting just left me disappointed.

I was on my way to work and had just walked out of 7-11, juggling my coffee, lunch box, gym bag and a bike.”You’ve got your hands full,” the homeless man said. I laughed at the thought of what a spectacle I probably was and then noticed he was overloaded with belongings, too (as most homeless people are).

“So do you,” I said back. He smiled and then asked if I could spare some change so he and his dog could get something to eat. Typical – though I guess I don’t blame him for trying. I told him no and kept walking, slightly picking up my pace. That may have been a little white lie, but I felt justified because I donate a fair share of change to various bums throughout the city every couple weeks or so.

After taking a few steps, though, I remembered I had an extra banana and wouldn’t mind “sparing” it, so I turned back and offered it to him. He hesitated before politely declining. “My dog doesn’t eat bananas,” was his reasoning. I’m guessing he knew what I was thinking, because then he added: “I don’t eat before my dog does.” Oh, well then in that case I believe you and think very highly of your devotion to your dog. (Stated with intense sarcasm if you didn’t catch that).

No, obviously I didn’t say that to him.

Up until that point I had been pleasantly surprised by his friendliness and how his presence didn’t make me feel uncomfortable. Not that his comment made me feel uncomfortable, but for a brief moment I had dismissed my stereotypical view of bums as beggars who just spend away donations on booze and drugs. But after he declined free food (even though he was begging for money to buy “food”), the view quickly returned. No, this one scenario doesn’t necessarily speak for all homeless people. But at this point, I prefer the drunk with the cardboard sign that says “Need money for beer” over this friendly, dog-loving liar. I still wouldn’t have given him money if he told me he needed it for booze, but I would have at least appreciated his honesty.

Back to Facebook. Once in the office, with my hands free and mind buzzing about what had just happened, I posted a status update about the incident. Again, it was just intended as a random tidbit about my daily operations, nothing more. But in the next few hours, a handful of friends commented on it.

My favorite is Emily’s comment: “When did beggars become choosers?” That couldn’t be closer to the truth, and I wonder if that’s where the saying came from. Since when did homeless people have it so good that they could be selective in their offerings? If they don’t have anything but the shoes on their feet and the bags on their backs (or a grocery cart if that’s their thing), then why would they turn down a free banana?! Sure, they’d prefer booze and drugs, or the money to buy those things, but you’d think they’d take whatever they can get. Sadly, I’m going to assume that my particular bum wasn’t putting his banana-hating bull dog before himself. Instead, I’m pretty confident it’s because he wanted my spare change to buy booze that he actually would not be sharing with his dog.

Once I posted my incident on Facebook, I quickly found out that many others are equally as bothered – and even outraged – by this. Numerous discussions followed, with many of my friends sharing similar experiences. One friend said she’d offered a bum food just to have him reject it and outright say he wanted money instead. Another offered his post-dinner-party leftover wine, which the bum gladly excepted without a second of hesitation.

I don’t really know what I expected from the homeless man in my incident, but, like I said before, it gave me a glimmer of hope that maybe all was not lost in the world of street people. Although I don’t know the circumstances that caused each homeless person to become just that – homeless – I’d like to think they’d actively try to better their situation given the opportunity. But that’s naive, optimistic Lindsay talking. Because sadly, it doesn’t appear to be the case. Unfortunate for genuine bums out there, I’ll be very unlikely to donate to future beggars I encounter – whether they’re asking for money or “food”.