My Master Cleanse Diary

Day One
I didn’t get hungry till noon and then again around 5, and it wasn’t feelings of starvation or horrible hunger pains. Just a slight feeling of wanting something substantial in my stomach. But the rest of the day was. I was extremely tired and cold today, but I don’t know if it’s attributed to the cleanse or that I had an exhausting weekend and it’s been especially cold out. I think that will be a difficulty going forward in the next 10 days – knowing what feelings and symptoms are because of the cleanse and what are just normal.

I was able to get a regular work out at the gym without feeling especially fatigued or weak. The manuscript I read about the cleanse says you’re supposed to be able to go about your daily life, including regular exercise. So we’ll see if anything changes in the next few days.

I’d have to say, just from my experience in the first day, that the most annoying part is juicing the lemons. It’s such a pain, and you get so little juice out of them! I don’t have a lemon juicer, which might be nice to have. I’ll look into it, but I hate to spend a bunch (I honestly don’t know how much they cost) for a one-time things. I’ve already spent quite a bit on this. The cayenne pepper was expensive and so was the “Grade B pure maple syrup”. I splurged on the jug with the nonspill cap, but all it does is leak and come pouring out with a small tilt. I think I’ve wasted more syrup than I’ll use.

Day Two
I woke up today with a major headache that lasted till now, as I turn in for bed. Again, I’m not sure if it’s related to the cleanse and lack of food. I was thinking it could be related to a caffeine withdrawal. For the past month-plus I’ve been drinking coffee almost every morning before work. So the headache could be attributed to not having my daily coffee in a while. (Note: I learned later from a friend who did the cleanse that in the second or third day a headache is common and that it’s the body stirring up and beginning to get rid of the toxins.)

I transferred my liquids (i.e. lemon juice and syrup) into water bottles so they were much more portable, cleaner and easier to use. I’m still finding I have to squeeze lemons every day. I guess a lemon produces two tablespoons of juice, which is how much I have to put in one serving. So you can imagine how many lemons I have to juice the night before to get me through the next day.

I was able to go for a 5-mile run after work. Felt pretty sluggish, so it was slow going for at least the first half. But then again, it was slightly up hill the first half. I didn’t really get hungry at all today.

Day Three
Today started out quite differently – quite horribly in fact. It had nothing to do with the Master Cleanse, though. Before heading to work, I managed to lock myself out of my apartment with my lemonade ingredients (as well as cell phone, purse and makeup) still inside. I managed to get to work on time because I was already dressed and I work just six blocks away. But I wasn’t able to “eat” until 3:30 pm when my roommate got home from her trip to the dessert! Needless to say, I was definitely feeling the hunger pains by then. I had been subsiding on hot and cold water all morning, trying to trick my stomach into thinking it was getting substance.

The rest of the afternoon and evening went fine, and I never really felt hungry. The headache that lasted all day yesterday was gone when I woke up this morning, and it never returned (knock on wood).

I took today off from the gym because I had plans that started immediately after work. I went to a girls shopping event with a friend and was tempted by free alcohol and food samples at every turn (one of my favorite aspects of this regular event), but I resisted and distracted myself with shopping. I’m a sucker for free alcohol and food, so it bummed me out to have to turn it down.

Day Four
It was another hectic morning, but, again, by no fault of the cleanse. I woke up to a clunked out fridge and all my frozen foods nearly defrosted, including lots of meat. I considered bringing them to my work freezer, but they had thawed out to much and couldn’t be refrozen. So the next solution would be to grill the chicken breast, fry up the hamburger and just make meals with the cooked meat the rest of the week. That’s what normal Lindsay would have done. But of course, the fridge has to die while I’m on this cleanse, which means making dinners with the food is pointless. I almost took it as a sign to just quit. But I didn’t, and it killed me to throw it all away – such a waste of food and money.

Anyway, once at work I had my breakfast concoction and the day went along as normal. I did get some hungry tummy rumblings around 3:30. I’m trying to time my drinks so I have four 16-ounce servings (which is actually two per the recipe) a day: one in the morning around 9, one around 11:30, one at 3ish and another in the evening for “dinner”. That leaves quite a gap in the evening if I go work out, so I might have to make some adjustments.

Day Five
Almost halfway there! Today was the hardest. I had the most tummy rumblings, plus I was surrounded by significantly more temptations today. I went to this awesome Caribbean restaurant with some coworkers for lunch just to hang out, which meant I had to watch them eat, and the food looked sooo good. Then, every Friday is “Beer Friday” at work, which is when everyone quits work at 4:30 and cracks open beers and wine for our unofficial end-of-the-week meeting. So I had to watch everyone partake while I drank my lemonade. Then, I went to a concert with a friend and couldn’t even have a single beer. I was able to order a drink from the bartender though – water with lemon please.

I started feeling some muscle aches today, mostly in my upper back and shoulders. I haven’t been overdoing it at the gym, so I know it’s not from that.

Despite the manuscripts encouragement not to, I bought jarred pure, organic lemon juice from Whole Foods because I am just so sick of juicing the lemons. The jarred juice seems to work fine, but it definitely doesn’t taste as good as the fresh stuff. And it lacks some of the pulp I was getting, and I know pulp has additional nutrients.

Day Six
OK, I lied yesterday. Today was by far the hardest. My theory is that I wasn’t sitting in my cubicle, distracted by work and not tempted by the food that wasn’t available. Instead, it being a Saturday, I was doing other things that exposed me to a lot of temptation.

I got up, had a nice workout and lemonade for breakfast. I was busy getting ready the first half of the day (which involved packing for a night I’d be spending down in OC), so I didn’t really think about food or eating. But then I arrived at my friend’s BBQ in the afternoon and basically put myself through torture. Her roommate was throwing a graduation party with all kinds of authentic BBQ fixin’s: grilled corn on the cob, burgers, grilled chicken breast, hot dogs, a potato dish, cupcakes and an open bar – all for a measly five bucks. Obviously I wasn’t eating and could actually only stay for about 40 minutes, so I didn’t have to pay.  But normal Lindsay would have seen the amazing deal and forked over the cash for a heaping plate without a second thought, regardless of how long I was staying. Instead, I watched a few people nibble and double fist while I sipped my lemonade.

After that I took my little 6-year-old buddy Jack to see Shreck 3, where the scent of popcorn lingered throughout the entire 1.5 hours we were in the theater. I don’t even like movie theater popcorn, but it was pure torment. After the movie we went back to his house where I made his yummy dinner right in front of my face and watched him eat. I was so tempted to sneak little bites. When I normally babysit for this family, I end up snacking quite a bit. I definitely couldn’t do that tonight. My night ended with drinks with my roommate, the neighbors and a friend visiting from Colorado. I had to turn down an offer for a drink and order a water – with lemon – on my own.

Needless to say, today was rough. But I powered through and am headed down the homestretch. In addition to all the temptation, I did get a lot of hunger growls. I don’t know if it was because I was finally getting hungry or my eyes were tricking my tummy.

Published by lindsayeholloway

Writer... editor... environmentalist... athlete...

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